Have you ever had someone look you in the eye and proceed to give you advice about something? Only to immediately realize that you completely disagreed with them? I’m fairly certain that every mom has had to deal with this unwanted advice at some point or another.
Nobody wants to hear unwanted advice, and yet it’s evidently a part of motherhood that we all have to work through. It starts with pregnancy advice–you’ve probably heard it.
“Sleep while you can!” (By the third trimester, that’s like a cruel joke, by the way)
“Make sure to (insert random advice)!”
To be honest, it doesn’t take very long for this battering of random advice to get old. Especially when half of it you don’t even agree with.
How to Handle Unwanted Advice
So how do you deal with the overflow of advice coming at you from all sides? How do you not lose your cool when people advice you to do things that you would never in a million years do?
If we’re being honest, being a mom requires an absurd amount of patience. Although, personally, I find it easier to be patient with my child than I do with people throwing unwanted, poor advice my way. There’s just something super annoying about being told you should give your one month old baby cough syrup so that he’ll sleep through the night, ya know? (True story, by the way. Someone actually told me to do that. No, I absolutely did not do it.)
Anyway, do your very best to be patient, despite the onslaught of advice.
You will likely hear the same piece of advice over and over again. And you will be given terrible advice. Sometimes, you will even get straight up dangerous advice. Learn to be patient and not lose your cool with the poor advice.
Filter Out the Bad Advice
Again, you will inevitably be given bad advice at some point. Learn to discern the difference between the good and the bad advice, and filter out the bad. Soak up the good advice, and let the rotten go in one ear and out the other. Not sure which is which? File it away and research it later.
Don’t let the bad, unwanted advice bog you down. I had a hard time learning this when I was pregnant with my son. While some advice I received was good, a lot of it was poor and unhelpful. It got to be very stressful every time someone started to relate advice to me, because I would get annoyed when it was obviously bad information.
Learn to let that stuff go. Don’t make yourself miserable by holding on to all the dumb stuff people tell you to do.
Hold on to the Good Advice
On the flip side, hold on to any good advice like a life raft. In general, most people really do mean well. Most people really do want to help you. Not all know what they’re talking about, but some do. Seek out the moms you respect and whose parenting styles line up with your own.
And when you find other moms and women who are able to give you good advice, seek them out. Look to them when you are unsure if you’ve been given good or bad advice. Ask them when you’re unsure. Talk to them when you’re frustrated with the unwanted advice.
Don’t sweat the unwanted advice. You can do this!
What about you?
What’s the worst piece of mom advice you’ve received? The best? Let me know in the comments below!